I don’t want to write this post.
Yesterday I found out about a second death in our online family of black women who advocate to empower and uplift, and again my heart sank. Blogger Karyn Washington passed away at the young age of 22 from an apparent suicide.
That word that I hate so much but I make a point to cover on my blog because I need someone out there to know that they are not alone.
Washington founded the website For Brown Girls to “encourage those struggling with accepting having a darker skin complexion to love and embrace the skin they are in.”
Like I said, I don’t want to write this post because it means yet another beautiful person has given up on this thing called life and we’re all left reeling from the blow and asking why. I did not know Karyn, but I know what it’s like to want it to end. Sources say she was having a very hard time dealing with the death of her mother late last year. I cannot even imagine what that was like for her. My heart just bleeds.
As I’ve said in many posts before this (and I’ll say in any posts afterward as long as my transparency will help someone)
Whenever I hear that someone has taken their own life my stomach drops into my feet and I sigh so deeply in my soul. I do so because, unlike many it seems, I totally get where that person’s mind was/is at the time that they just wanted life to stop, for the noise to end. Before I go on, no one needs to write me any lengthy notes about the value of life at this time. I’m ok, I’m not there right now … but I have been and I can relate and understand the mind of the depressed and suicidal.
and yes my loves, I’m still ok. I’m (ironically) right smack dab in the middle of a self-imposed 30 Day Happiness Challenge and, (even more ironically) it’s teaching me that sadness is indeed a healthy part of happiness.
Before I end I MUST point you to this amazingly written post by GorgeousinGrey.com’s Ty Alexander:
Please read it, it is an amazing peak into grief, sorrow, community, coping and mental health.
I do posts like these because I use every opportunity to repeat the message to anyone secretly suffering with mental illness, discouragement, depression, hopeless, or who is suicidal. Please get help!
There is hope … there is light … you can laugh again.
If you or anyone you know is in danger of harming themselves click here for resources and someone you can talk to.
Love & Light,